If you’re queer, is it possible to be in a relationship with a straight, cis person? She’s Nonbinary cuts to the heart of a complex question with a simple answer.
The short follows Max (Jesse McLeod; Teenage Sex and Death at Camp Miasma) and Jake (Alexander Steele Zonjic) as they move into their new duplex. Things begin with a story about Jake misgendering Max, their assigned female at birth nonbinary partner, in a conversation with a bartender. Because Jake accepts that he messed up, Max is quick to brush the incident off.
In a move to what seems like christening their new digs, they start to make love. Before things get kicked into gear, Max pauses to tell Jake important news. As Max describes it, the sex was a going-away party of sorts. They are officially scheduled to have top surgery to remove their breasts in a month. Ta-ta to the ta-ta’s.
From Jake’s point of view, that is strong news to break before getting sex. But from Max’s POV, the sex was sugar before the medicine. Jake is unsure of how to process the news, and all hell breaks loose. Max wants assurance that Jake will accept them post-op and will continue loving them, but Jake fails horrendously to do so. Ultimately, the question is posed: if Max no longer physically looks like a traditional woman, what will that make Jake? Is he scared of being queer?

She’s Nonbinary serves as a Surgeon General warning for queer-straight relationships by using rapid-fire dialogue and strong physical performances to challenge cis norms. Queerness isn’t just about who you are and aren’t attracted to; it’s a thought process and belief system that goes beyond the binary of Western conventions. It’s a dual act of rejection and acceptance, living one’s truth while going against the norm.
A straight partner using the phrase “As an ally…” as Jake does undercuts what it means to be in a relationship with a queer person. To be attracted to, in a relationship, and in love with a queer person means that you cannot be straight; the contradiction cannot stand if your love truly goes below the surface. When the dust settles, it is pretty clear where the two partners begin and end.
In watching She’s Nonbinary, the biggest critique may be that Max should not have used sex as a gateway to make such an important announcement. To blindside Jake is to put him in an awkward position. But, deep down, Max likely did it because they knew Jake could not handle the news and they wanted to soften the blow as much as possible.
Max, the call is coming from inside the house (literally and figuratively). Get out now.
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